I need to share with you exceptionally perfectly-matching case and text to the time just passed. Probably some of you, during recent holidays heard from your grandma, auntie, mother, cousin, high school teacher, the most wonderful questions and saw the dumbest of possible smiles: “And how about you? When are you planning to have children? Oh, just see how this baby suits you, what are you waiting for, after all you are married already so many years? You look beautiful, your face is rounded and beaming – do you want to tell us something?”
Is it that strange that what is in my pants is only my business?
First of all, having children is individual decisions and there are stories about it behind every person. Second, each woman has her own, or knows the story of another woman and should be aware that shooting questions like this can be painful. Third, it’s 21st century – women go out to the streets, manifesting their rights to decide about themselves, also so as not to poison each other with such idiotic questions. Men never ask me about my plans for a child, why women do?
This is probably not only a matter of difference between generations, environments or place of residence. So, what makes the girls so stupid and tactless? Yesterday, an enemy of procreation, today “every real woman must know this pain and taste of motherhood”, “life without children does not make any sense”. Recently, miss fit, and suddenly “… what do you know, you never gave birth, it’s not possible to return to the pre-pregnancy figure”. Isn’t it ironic!
On the other hand, I see complains about the toil of motherhood. It’s me who is lucky because I can sleep, go out on a date with my husband, plan something, have time for myself, go on vacation, because “when the child appears, this is the end of freedom” So, what’s going on, is it blessing of punishment? Is this a duty? Any patriotic mission? Or maybe only pressure of the society? Or maybe it’s cool to be? Why am I an egoist and a careerist when I don’t have children?
Yes, I am not a mother, and I do not know this special feeling, but no one knows my story and has no right to violate my personal rights and my privacy. I’m learning not to give evasive answers. It’s difficult, but if you experience the same, think of it is worth making good face to a bad game.
It’s only your business. If you don’t want stupid or painful questions anymore, just say it straight.
Before you ask an intimate question, think whether you would like someone to look into your pants.
You will survive without this knowledge, and as if “SHE” wants to share with you, she will do it when she trusts you.
Girls let’s help each other. Do not push others to feel guilty, and first of all DO NOT let anyone make you feel like!
P.S. Thank you for caring, I’m very well 😉